google-site-verification=U0Q4nUf7gy008G2e6vjitL4htHLAso-Tlnzg4z6xYtI Season 3 | Episode 5 - Addressing the Elephant in the Room® - "not burnout, but going at a good pace" with Del Duduit - Addressing the ELEPHANT in the Room®

Episode 5

"Not Burnout..., but Going at a Good Pace" with Del Duduit (did-way)

Getting too many balls in the air and instead of juggling and having crashed into your head, not burnout, but going at a good pace

not burnout, but going at a good pace

Addressing the ELEPHANT in the Room® is a ONE LIGHT AHEAD production made in association with Eric Ballestero.

© Copyright ONE LIGHT AHEAD® & April Ballestero & Eric Ballestero 2021. All Rights Reserved.

Host: Coach April Ballestero

Guest: Del Duduit

Produced by: Eric Ballestero

Transcript
Coach April Ballestero:

We are officially recording our next episode of addressing the elephant in the room.

Coach April Ballestero:

It is season three and we have another amazing guest with us today.

Coach April Ballestero:

First of all.

Coach April Ballestero:

Everyone know it is all about addressing elephants because there's an opportunity.

Coach April Ballestero:

There's a need, there's an opportunity for people to discover what they want to talk about, how they want to address it and

Coach April Ballestero:

And so my name is Coach April Ballestero, I'm the founder and the Strategic Leadership Coach for One Light Ahead.

Coach April Ballestero:

I get to work with people daily on learning, how to love what they do again by owning their leadership, helping them defeat

Coach April Ballestero:

And I get to choose to host this, Addressing the elephant in the room podcast and I have this amazing guest.

Coach April Ballestero:

Let me see if I do this perfectly,

Coach April Ballestero:

Mr.

Coach April Ballestero:

Dell Duduit.

Coach April Ballestero:

Did I do it?

Coach April Ballestero:

I did it wrong.

Coach April Ballestero:

I know I did.

Dell Duduit:

It's okay.

Coach April Ballestero:

Dell pronounce your name for me.

Dell Duduit:

It's pronounced Did-Way.

Coach April Ballestero:

Duduit (did-way).

Coach April Ballestero:

Okay, I'm going to get it.

Coach April Ballestero:

I have so much fun.

Dell Duduit:

Nothing like it looks.

Dell Duduit:

Right.

Dell Duduit:

Dell is an amazing multitalented individual that has a publisher a multitude of books, we got to meet at a recent writing

Dell Duduit:

Del what's your elephant.

Dell Duduit:

If I could just choose one, I've got like 75 of them.

Dell Duduit:

I can bring up the line here, the elephant I think for me is it's a combination of things, but a lot of it

Dell Duduit:

So you're not burnout and juggling a lot of balls.

Dell Duduit:

So, that's what I'm trying to learn, how to do a little better job on, because it does have, some can have

Dell Duduit:

You know, getting too many balls in the air and have them instead of juggling and having crashed out on your head.

Dell Duduit:

Um, that's, that's what I'm, that's what I try to deal with.

Coach April Ballestero:

So Dell you're claiming the fact that you're not a great juggler.

Coach April Ballestero:

You don't, you're not to handle 15 balls in the air at the same time.

Coach April Ballestero:

Even though we all believe that we are capable of doing that, right?, And yet one of the gifts of recognizing before you get to burn out,

Coach April Ballestero:

How do I want to handle it?

Coach April Ballestero:

And how do I want to recognize?

Coach April Ballestero:

I think one of the terminology uses pace.

Coach April Ballestero:

What do I want my pace to look like?

Coach April Ballestero:

So if you were to say the, the biggest elephant that you really have watched happen is.

Coach April Ballestero:

How do you maintain all that?

Coach April Ballestero:

Correct?

Dell Duduit:

Yeah, because when I was first started out as an author five years ago I was doing anything and everything I could

Dell Duduit:

And it just is time consuming.

Dell Duduit:

And so I can multitask pretty well, but there comes a point in time where I just, I didn't tell anybody.

Dell Duduit:

No.

Dell Duduit:

Hey, can you write this?

Dell Duduit:

Sure.

Dell Duduit:

Can you write that?

Dell Duduit:

Okay.

Dell Duduit:

And then they weren't paying you and you're just meeting all these deadlines and you're just like,

Dell Duduit:

I have a family.

Dell Duduit:

So it was, uh, a lot of times.

Dell Duduit:

I was working every night harder than I was during my day job.

Dell Duduit:

And so it came a point in time, trying to get my social media, trying to get my platform up, go to writers, conferences,

Dell Duduit:

So it was a lot of things going on.

Dell Duduit:

So instead of juggling balls, a couple of people threw in a couple of like chainsaws toothpicks I'm trying to juggle.

Dell Duduit:

So it just came a point in time who recently has had to step back and tell some folks know and to just take a break for a little bit,

Dell Duduit:

So that's a big, that's a big you know, the aha moment is, when you're not enjoying it anymore, you'd have to take a little break.

Dell Duduit:

It's not saying you won't, let's take a little break.

Dell Duduit:

Everybody needs a break.

Dell Duduit:

It's so powerful.

Dell Duduit:

And so let's talk about the process of how the conversation really came up for you because everyone listening it,

Dell Duduit:

Somebody recently mentioned, I feel like I'm drowning and that's not a healthy place to be.

Dell Duduit:

There's an opportunity to really recognize, how do I, how does this conversation come up with ourselves personally?

Dell Duduit:

And how does this conversation come up in just the arenas that you're in, especially in the author arena you've

Dell Duduit:

How has it how do we see it come up?

Dell Duduit:

It's just a build up of frustrations a little bit.

Dell Duduit:

I didn't shoot anybody, but it's just a buildup of frustration.

Dell Duduit:

Junior's you know, your time's being demanded from a lot of people being pulled from a lot of different directions and

Dell Duduit:

Um, again, I love being busy.

Dell Duduit:

I'd rather be busy than bored any day.

Dell Duduit:

I wrote, I think four or five years straight on my blog every week without missing a blog and do any shows all the time.

Dell Duduit:

And I just had to just step back and say, you know what?

Dell Duduit:

Yeah, there's other, that's important.

Dell Duduit:

It's all important, but there's a couple other things, a little bit more important.

Dell Duduit:

And so I just, talked to my wife about it and I decide when I seem to , I just need take a break for a little bit.

Dell Duduit:

I'm not quitting.

Dell Duduit:

I'm not giving it up.

Dell Duduit:

I just had to take a little.

Dell Duduit:

Vacation from my keyboard for a little bit.

Dell Duduit:

And that included social media.

Dell Duduit:

I went dark for several, a couple of weeks, and I'm still not as active as I was, but it's still there, but

Dell Duduit:

refresh.

Dell Duduit:

It's so important.

Dell Duduit:

So many things you just said there in the way, I love to explain it to people.

Dell Duduit:

It's like a juice box.

Dell Duduit:

You remember those cardboard juice boxes that they're still around.

Dell Duduit:

I'm sure.

Dell Duduit:

And yet, if you contemplate everybody that needs something from you is a straw.

Dell Duduit:

What happens to that juice boxes.

Dell Duduit:

It becomes depleted and literally collapses and people are just like that.

Dell Duduit:

So your awareness is that if my juice box is going to collapse, I need to take time to figure out how I put juice back in it.

Dell Duduit:

Right?

Dell Duduit:

Yeah, exactly.

Dell Duduit:

And I'm starting to revisit those emotions where are probably going to get back into it pretty soon and start writing

Dell Duduit:

I just had to, because it was affecting some of my writing.

Dell Duduit:

My, one of the last books I wrote I had a deadline and I wrote it and I thought this, I wasn't real happy with

Dell Duduit:

It was just I was just getting through it.

Dell Duduit:

I would just get in that deadline and just, okay.

Dell Duduit:

So I thought to myself, I, I didn't really.

Dell Duduit:

Give it what I could, because I was for one, I was empty and I was, I've written so many these great, these books, and I'm so

Dell Duduit:

But, after a while they all sounded the same.

Dell Duduit:

And so I just had to reevaluate my time right now.

Dell Duduit:

And I have a couple of projects I'm gonna start working on soon.

Dell Duduit:

Maybe in the next month or so, and some events coming out, almost go back to uh, yeah, it was just stepping back.

Dell Duduit:

And, and

Coach April Ballestero:

Dell, what are the opportunities and I've quoted, or you know, shared your pictures of your books.

Coach April Ballestero:

I adore your writing.

Coach April Ballestero:

I love and even in your conversations about juggling chainsaws and ice picks, that is just how you write.

Coach April Ballestero:

That's how you verbalize these visual opportunities to process what's really happening, right?

Coach April Ballestero:

You take a story in your, in one of the books that I comment on is the dugout devotions and take people's real life stories

Coach April Ballestero:

And that pace that you want to manage you don't get it operated to, to share that kind of message.

Coach April Ballestero:

To share that kind of story and inspiration.

Coach April Ballestero:

It, it, it requires a place of being fulfilled and abundant and knowing how you want to share that.

Coach April Ballestero:

So everyone listening.

Coach April Ballestero:

Has the opportunity to recognize the gift of knowing their pace and knowing how to slow down and knowing how

Coach April Ballestero:

If you're starting to get your to barrel, you're starting to have these things.

Coach April Ballestero:

So as you, you hear that come up and you, like I said, very invested in the author world.

Coach April Ballestero:

How how have you seen that in other authors?

Coach April Ballestero:

How have you seen that conversation come up with the publishers, the timelines, the deadlines, the platform.

Coach April Ballestero:

There's just so many conversations when you become a writer, which, I'm excited to be.

Coach April Ballestero:

No you know, that, that is just you know, I've been writing blogs for years, and I've been writing all kinds of different things, but

Coach April Ballestero:

The.

Coach April Ballestero:

Depth of preparation, the depth of, oh, there's just so many pieces of the puzzle.

Coach April Ballestero:

I hadn't, I didn't know.

Coach April Ballestero:

Yeah.

Coach April Ballestero:

And so in your, in that arena, you're really well exposed so that, what do you hear the conversations?

Coach April Ballestero:

How do you help them?

Coach April Ballestero:

You know, Just work through that.

Dell Duduit:

Yeah.

Dell Duduit:

And there, there, there comes just a point in time where you just have to tell yourself you know, it's not too much.

Dell Duduit:

It's just, you've got to start saying no to some things and you have to take a breath because you can get it, sucked in to where

Dell Duduit:

try to maintain it andI was talking to you prior to our recording that, I'm seriously thinking about hiring somebody to run my

Dell Duduit:

I like the size of it.

Dell Duduit:

I like my following but it's refreshing.

Dell Duduit:

I went off one of my platforms for about two or three weeks and it was refreshing to wake up to my

Dell Duduit:

And it was just become a, part of it was refreshing to have some peace and quiet and not my phone dinging about every 30 to 40 seconds.

Dell Duduit:

And so I just thought this is just wear me out.

Dell Duduit:

And so, and I hear other, some other friends of mine go through the same thing too.

Dell Duduit:

They just stayed a step back.

Dell Duduit:

A good friend of mine last year.

Dell Duduit:

Just went off the radar for a little while and he said awhile and I'm going to recharge.

Dell Duduit:

And I thought and that kinda, I thought I'd love to do that.

Dell Duduit:

And then about a year later I was doing it.

Dell Duduit:

I just said, I called him.

Dell Duduit:

I said, I'm taking a break.

Dell Duduit:

He goes, "yeah.

Dell Duduit:

yeah.

Dell Duduit:

It's good too.

Dell Duduit:

So cause you can get so rammed up in it and that's all.

Dell Duduit:

And it can to the point where I, it wasn't controlling me, but it was, I was paying a whole lot more attention to it than I should have been.

Coach April Ballestero:

And there's so many pieces of that puzzle because in your, in the author arena, you want to

Coach April Ballestero:

That includes social media, email marketing.

Coach April Ballestero:

Just so many pieces of that puzzle.

Coach April Ballestero:

And yet, being a business coach.

Coach April Ballestero:

I get to help people.

Coach April Ballestero:

Understand that.

Coach April Ballestero:

Being an author, you are running a business.

Coach April Ballestero:

Your book is a business.

Coach April Ballestero:

Your book is an opportunity in the publishing world.

Coach April Ballestero:

Publishers require authors to help process the sell.

Coach April Ballestero:

And and we learn all that through these amazing writing conferences.

Coach April Ballestero:

And yet I love how you said, I heard somebody say it.

Coach April Ballestero:

I heard somebody say, I chose this in a lot of the offers have to be willing to say, am I willing to release some control?

Coach April Ballestero:

Am I really to allow somebody to be my voice for a season to help with social media, to help with marketing?

Coach April Ballestero:

Because that's a big.

Coach April Ballestero:

Commitment when you think you've got to be the only voice?

Dell Duduit:

Yeah, you're right because, and what you touched on was right.

Dell Duduit:

A lot of publishers do expect the author to be a big part of the marketing plan and I enjoy that and I've made some really good friends that way.

Dell Duduit:

And I'm going to continue doing that.

Dell Duduit:

It's just not going to be full force.

Dell Duduit:

Day and night as I've been.

Dell Duduit:

So, Uh, and another good friend of mine, who's a very successful business person, had a post the other day and

Dell Duduit:

And this wasn't to me, it was just out there.

Dell Duduit:

If you're able to hire somebody to run your social media and I went, aha, that's a validation.

Dell Duduit:

So we're I am looking, I am exploring that option to, look at maybe like a college intern who needs some experience

Dell Duduit:

And then.

Dell Duduit:

We'll work with them on that.

Dell Duduit:

So I'm looking forward to that and

Coach April Ballestero:

you can serve supervise the whole process.

Coach April Ballestero:

You can actually require in the systems too.

Coach April Ballestero:

Allow, you have to give permission over what they create.

Coach April Ballestero:

Yes, exactly.

Coach April Ballestero:

There's so many different opportunities for that.

Coach April Ballestero:

That a lot of authors don't recognize there is you can still be involved.

Coach April Ballestero:

Yeah.

Coach April Ballestero:

You can delegate some of the work and that's true for all business owners

Dell Duduit:

and, we'll, we'll line up times and schedule posts and things like that.

Dell Duduit:

So I just, it would be a welcome.

Dell Duduit:

Addition to, what I'm trying to do.

Dell Duduit:

Cause I don't free up some more time for me to maintain, stay fresh and creative because man tell you while social

Dell Duduit:

And it takes so much time.

Dell Duduit:

Yeah.

Dell Duduit:

And it

Coach April Ballestero:

takes energy and pace as you started off the conversation with is that, Only

Coach April Ballestero:

And saying, I get to be a marketer.

Coach April Ballestero:

I get to be a writer.

Coach April Ballestero:

I get to be a creative.

Coach April Ballestero:

And I get to do all of that at different times.

Coach April Ballestero:

And sometimes all business owners, which I love to remind people, attempt to do it all at once.

Dell Duduit:

Yeah, I would, yeah, I would do that a lot.

Dell Duduit:

Speed at times nonstop because I want to get the book sales up and I want to get this up and then meet my deadlines and then work my job.

Dell Duduit:

And so it got where it was just like, very hectic for.

Dell Duduit:

A couple of years actually.

Dell Duduit:

So nonstop.

Dell Duduit:

People told me how I did it well, you I didn't sleep much.

Dell Duduit:

Uh, I started noticing and the ma-made the necessary adjustments because I still want to continue to write.

Dell Duduit:

I have a lot of good ideas and projects down the road.

Dell Duduit:

I'm going to get through this year.

Dell Duduit:

And I have a couple of book releases later this year, one next year already.

Dell Duduit:

Um, I want to start to work on some other projects soon and I think.

Dell Duduit:

Here in a few weeks, I'll be ready.

Dell Duduit:

I'll be ready to get back.

Dell Duduit:

Cause it got to the place where writing was just like, okay, I gotta get this done.

Dell Duduit:

Instead of, I want to, as I got to get this, I gotta meet this deadline.

Dell Duduit:

And so work suffered a little bit.

Dell Duduit:

So you, I want to get back to the poor.

Dell Duduit:

I'm saying, Hey, I can't write, I can't wait to get home to finish this.

Coach April Ballestero:

And the joy of writing, right?

Coach April Ballestero:

Is that.

Coach April Ballestero:

Yeah.

Coach April Ballestero:

And one of the gifts that one of the authors gave at the conferences, you've got a message inside.

Coach April Ballestero:

You get an opportunity to share it, right?

Coach April Ballestero:

If you make that commitment and, and I loved how you said, I want to be at a pace where I'm excited about what I

Coach April Ballestero:

I want to be at a place where I truly enjoy each piece of the puzzle.

Coach April Ballestero:

And I commit to having boundaries around those pieces of the puzzle.

Coach April Ballestero:

That's what I'm hearing you

Dell Duduit:

say.

Dell Duduit:

Yeah, because, I kind of made light of it a few months ago, but there, there is writer's block.

Dell Duduit:

I I've been, I didn't go through it, but there were times where I just sat down and I thought I can't do this right

Dell Duduit:

Um, I do like a deadline cause when I was in newspapers and in sports writing, I had a deadline and I liked that.

Dell Duduit:

The game was over.

Dell Duduit:

I had too have much oriented to hours.

Dell Duduit:

I like that.

Dell Duduit:

But yeah, so there's a little difference on that to where you, that was a thrill, it was fun, but here are the last several months

Dell Duduit:

So that's where I just realized I needed to just step back.

Coach April Ballestero:

i Iove that you're willing to share that and be open about that because all authors go through this, right?

Coach April Ballestero:

All business owners go through this.

Dell Duduit:

Probably I would think so, but yeah, I mean, I I I've put out a lot of, I've put out a lot of material

Dell Duduit:

I had to Google and explore each go pull it in the station for a little bit and get, and get refueled.

Dell Duduit:

Did your battery charge to?

Coach April Ballestero:

Exactly what you said if I heard you right.

Coach April Ballestero:

In the last four years, you've had 14 books published, that you wrote or been closed?

Dell Duduit:

Yeah.

Dell Duduit:

And um, it was, I'm very fortunate and blessed for that.

Dell Duduit:

We've actually got 11 now.

Dell Duduit:

We've got three more coming out this year, so it'd be 14.

Dell Duduit:

And then One next year already, it will be out released next year.

Dell Duduit:

So we've got a busy year ahead of us as fun year.

Dell Duduit:

We just had the one release back in February, we're back in March.

Dell Duduit:

And then we have one in July, one in August, and one in October.

Dell Duduit:

So not too far apart from each other.

Dell Duduit:

So it's going to be a hectic few days, a few months.

Dell Duduit:

I'm glad I'm getting recharged now because it's going to be a whirlwind of the next four or five months

Coach April Ballestero:

And, and so to begin the wrap-up processes, I gave you a heads up because we'd like to be concise and we'd like to

Coach April Ballestero:

The question that I love to leave people with is, elephants are big, right?

Coach April Ballestero:

And so many people attempt to take it all on and take everybody out of it.

Coach April Ballestero:

And I remind people, we just.

Coach April Ballestero:

We get a bite one bite at a time.

Coach April Ballestero:

And so, like you said, that recharge concept, educate the listeners.

Coach April Ballestero:

If you were to say, what was the biggest bite or the best bite that you would really recommend to people that are really resonating

Dell Duduit:

I would say, recognize it, see it, see the need for it.

Dell Duduit:

And stop be so anxious.

Dell Duduit:

Don't be so anxious to please everybody and learn the word.

Dell Duduit:

No, that's a great word.

Dell Duduit:

Learned to tell somebody I don't, I can't do this right now, or I don't want to do this right now

Dell Duduit:

I was telling everybody, yeah, I'll do that.

Dell Duduit:

I'll do that.

Dell Duduit:

I'll do that.

Dell Duduit:

And then You know, I got to, you got to the place where I just, my page was crazy.

Dell Duduit:

It was just off the charts.

Dell Duduit:

And so I would say recognize it.

Dell Duduit:

Because it could really take the fun out of it.

Dell Duduit:

So recognize your pace, set a good pace.

Dell Duduit:

If it's slow, go slow.

Dell Duduit:

If you're used to that way, don't adjust your pace.

Dell Duduit:

Go at your pace.

Dell Duduit:

Don't let others dictate your pace for you and go that way.

Dell Duduit:

Go down that road at your, whether it's full-blown.

Dell Duduit:

If you affect your way, you've worked better.

Dell Duduit:

Do it.

Dell Duduit:

If it's slower, do it go slow, but you dictate your pace.

Dell Duduit:

Don't let anybody else do that for you.

Coach April Ballestero:

You get to lead yourself, you get to choose how you eat and I love the way you said, if your pace operates at

Coach April Ballestero:

And then I go do another sprint that might work for you and you need to do the study, slow turtle, then do the slightly slow turtle, right?

Coach April Ballestero:

Whatever that is for you.

Coach April Ballestero:

I love that.

Coach April Ballestero:

And that's a real bite of the elephant really.

Coach April Ballestero:

It is a gift to have you with us as a gift, to as a publisher and, working to be very influential author.

Coach April Ballestero:

You are, you get to make impact that's what we always work to do.

Coach April Ballestero:

How do they get ahold of you or how do they find all your books?

Coach April Ballestero:

How do they find all the different opportunities?

Coach April Ballestero:

I very much enjoy everything you write and I'm really excited to share it with our audience

Dell Duduit:

They can go to my website, which I'll spell it's D E L D U I t.com.

Dell Duduit:

There I've, kinda been dark for a couple of weeks, but I'm getting ready to light it back up, but it's still there.

Dell Duduit:

I just haven't been paying on it lately so they can go in there.

Dell Duduit:

They can go on Amazon.

Dell Duduit:

They can find my books there.

Dell Duduit:

They can.

Dell Duduit:

Any major bookstore Barnes & Nobles, Books-A-Million wherever books are sold?

Dell Duduit:

Most of my books are there New Hope Publishers, Iron Stream Media.

Dell Duduit:

They can go to Indiana University Press for some of the other books.

Dell Duduit:

So yeah, there's, just put my name in and it'll, there'll be ways to get ahold of me.

Dell Duduit:

It'll pop up and you can follow me on Twitter @DelDuit and so forth like that.

Dell Duduit:

I'm typically available in here the next few weeks.

Dell Duduit:

I probably a little bit more available.

Dell Duduit:

Once I come out of my hibernation,

Coach April Ballestero:

you're getting you're, you're making sure that all the, the parts have been well-fueled and oiled and all the pieces that are,

Dell Duduit:

Okay.

Dell Duduit:

Yes.

Dell Duduit:

It's been a fast and furious four or five years, so it's been just nonstop.

Dell Duduit:

So it's been great to have enjoyed it, but I want to keep producing and if I didn't recharge, I wouldn't be able to produce right now.

Coach April Ballestero:

Well the exciting thing is you're deciding what that pace is for you and how you want to

Dell Duduit:

Exactly.

Dell Duduit:

And I've got a good support team around me as well.

Dell Duduit:

So that's the main thing, have a good support team of three or four or five people that you can reach out to and just

Coach April Ballestero:

I love it.

Coach April Ballestero:

Thank you, sir.

About the Podcast

Show artwork for Addressing the ELEPHANT in the Room®
Addressing the ELEPHANT in the Room®
We discuss hard things to talk about and shed light on difficult subjects.

About your hosts

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April Ballestero

Author, Facilitator, Founder, Consultant, Speaker, and Strategic Leadership Coach guiding light bulb moments. Thankful to be celebrating 10 years of guiding, coaching, and leading industry leaders such as attorneys, coaches, chiropractors, financial planners, the real estate industry, and many other sales and business professionals across the nation. The celebration goes on to include over 20 years of business, professional and personal development which I am so honored to share as a vessel to our clients, coaches, and community.
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Eric Ballestero

Eric Ballestero has worked with Coach April Ballestero since before ONE LIGHT AHEAD's inception in 2011 while he was still in school and has continually brought new ideas and a lot of technical help to the team. He now produces the Addressing the ELEPHANT in the Room podcast in addition to being the Operations Coordinator to ONE LIGHT AHEAD.